Holy Hispanico!

Dear Jesus Lover,

The Lord was suffering a little Gertrude Street withdrawal from his recent Melbourne visit. Therefore, he decided to take a stroll down Surry Hills Crown Street to help cushion his come down.

The cafe culture was not as good but he came across this interesting individual:

Such an avid Jesus Lover!

 This smiley gentleman even let him tap dance on the old cash register. Another fine example of when old is gold!

“Child, you have it wrong, I am supposed to brand you.”

 Jesus marvelled at the giant rubber stamp they used to brand their paper bags. Sometimes manual labour just adds that extra touch. He looked around at the offerings of the store of fair trade sourced merchandise. Ahh..the array of crosses, sugar skulls and portraits of one of his finer children Frida Kahlo on offer.

He left with a small purchase..

“SQueak – get the bag!”

Next time you are in the mood for some sugar skulls or some insane accessories don’t forget to check out Holy Kitsch where you will get service with a smile. Jesus gives this store his blessing!!

Rock On!

Wheeze & Squeak

Holy Kitsch: http://www.holykitsch.com.au/pages/stores-trading-hours


Dear Jesus Lover,

yesterday’s meeting with the Spaniard has given the Lord food for thought.  He made his way down to the local clinic to take advantage of free healthcare and get a quick once over.  It is no good to resurrect to a body needing work done.

Form filling…

Serious illnesses, accidents  and conditions include crucifixion, stab wound and resurrection.

 He agreed to pee in a container but passed on the prostate exam.  The nurses didn’t look like they would provide him with a happy ending. He also noticed their acrylics and did not want to risk a rectal tear.

He felt comfortable on this cross.

Just a little pull to calm the nerves. The only time gas is good!

He found this slightly unnecessary.

Negative for Chlamydia!!!  Yay!

The doctors gave His Holiness a clean bill of health.  He goes forward with a spring in his step and renewed zest for life.  Play safe and don’t forget the rubber kids!  His Holiness recommends Durex, tried, tested and loved.

Rock on,

 Wheeze & SQueak