Stairway to Heaven

Dear Jesus Lover,

Monday is upon us again.  He is dragging his feet all the way to the Office.  Sometimes even the Boss has to look like He is mucking in with the rest.  But He draws the line at photocopying for that is a task for His secretarial bitches.

He embraces technology on the commute to work.  No rush hour traffic.  Ever.

Jesus and his administrative army of white fluff.  The team behind all your answered and unanswered prayers.

Work hard, delegate wherever possible, never accept blame, do overtime so you may be paid to go on Facebook after hours and enthusiastically lick superior ass so one day you too might have your own office and an army of administrative bitches.

Rock on,

Wheeze & SQueak

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Tending To Your Flock

Dear Jesus Lover,

Monday has come around again.  The Messiah hopes you have enjoyed your weekend.  He certainly had a good time (thanks Otter).  However, you must not neglect your calling.  His Holiness did not and decided to visit the common people, preaching his word.  He starts off the afternoon indulging with one of his disciples over an over-priced lunch.

Ready to rock on!

He then went door to door preaching his good work.  (We didn’t mention self praise is no praise)

I will lead this lamb to the slaughter

Jesus gets in all the good gigs. (Buddies with the door bitch)

He decided to go all the way and catch public transport just like a commoner.  (He did not appreciate the wet bench or lack of shade)

Or lack of a bus and civilisation

Jesus had a revelation; the ones on death’s door are best – they offer cookies and milk.

Rock on,

Wheeze & SQueak